And just like that...

She's all done nursing.

I went of out town for a few days to belly dance and tried to pump.  After 20 minutes for 2 nights and only getting a few frustrating drops, I decided that I was done. 

When I went to put her to bed my first night home, using a cup of milk instead of nursing, she was not pleased.  She hit and kicked and screamed and scratched.  I apologized and told her that my milk was all gone...and cried.  She drank her milk and went to bed.  I cried some more.  I felt so badly.  How could I take that away from her?  How could I take that time away from both of us?  How could I do that to my baby?????

Good thing is, it's getting better.  She fights it a little now and then, but nothing like those first few nights.  We still get some good snuggling in at bed time, but it's just not the same.  And I feel so guilty. 

Funny thing is, I was getting a hard time for still nursing...and now I'm getting a hard time for stopping.  Amazing how everyone has an opinion, that they just have to share.  Wouldn't it be easier if we just let people raise their babies they way that they want to?  Since when did any of this beome anyone else's business?

I've been watching the reactions to the cover of TIME magazine on facebook for the past week.  Some are disgusted and totally bash that poor mom for her choice to nurse her toddler.  Others are the extreme opposite, supporting her by rocking their own photos of their breastfeeding toddler.  I've even seen some covers created to mock the nursing mom, including one with chicken nuggets on it.  Again, I would ask people...can't we just leave others alone?  Why is it any of our business what someone else feels comfortable doing? 

And then people go off on tangents...vaccinations, circumcision, co-sleeping, crying it out, etc.  The list goes on and on...and on.  And then there's more bashing and berating.  Of people.  Making their own decisions.  Aren't we all adults? 
Since becoming pregnant, I've heard plenty of opinions about what I am doing or not doing.  It makes me crazy, but I've learned to smile and nod...and then do whatever the hell I want!  As a whole, we need to just agree to disagree about parenting.  Everyone thinks they have it figured out, or that their way is the right way...  Seems to me, this world is a pretty good example of the fact that no one has come up with the perfect parenting style. 

I think we're all just doing the best we can.  Let's learn to respect each other for that.

My body, my choice

I know this may come as a shock to you and be totally disgusting to some of you, as well.

Fact of the matter is, Neva is still nursing.  Yes, she's almost 20 months and she is STILL nursing.

I've been told that she's old enough to eat a steak, she doesn't need it.  She's old enough to ask for it, she doesn't need it.  She's old enough to drink cow's milk, she doesn't need it.  While she is old enough to do all of these things, that doesn't mean that my milk doesn't still benefit her.

Google it.  There's all kinds of research being done about how beneficial breast milk is for babies from 12-24 months.  The proof is in the pudding, people.

And besides the research....WHO cares?!?!  This is what we are made to do.  Hundreds of years ago, heck, thousands of years ago, babies nursed for much longer than they do now.  And it worked.  They didn't have formula, they didn't have blenders to make baby food.  And Moms did it and people didn't think it was gross.  Now, do it in public...and watch the looks you get from other people.  I'm not going to lie, I will not nurse Neva in front of anyone anymore because I don't want the judgement...obviously it makes me crazy to just even talk with people about it!

Nursing must have gone out the window with curves.  Thank you, society.  Thank you very much.