Moment of Weakness

Lately I've been thinking about my whole labor and birth experience....and about being a new mom. While I think Neva's birth was amazing, I have been wondering more and more about how the others feel about it. I hate this about myself, but I am a people pleaser...and am always concerned with how others view me.

Do they think I was too loud? Do they think I was a wuss? Do they think I could have done it better? If so, how? Do they think I did it wrong? Are they even thinking about this at all?

And what do people think now? Are they commenting on Neva's super sweet chubby cheeks and thinking she's too big? Are they judging me for not having all the weight off yet? Are they judging the decisions we make as a family? Do they think I am weak for giving in and giving her a pacifier? Or judging the things that we think are best???

I hate that I even think about this...I mean, really? Who cares? I had a baby, at home, with no pain meds. And she is amazing. She is healthy and happy and beautiful!

I mean, look at her...

Dear Magic Sleep Fairy

Dear Magic Sleep Fairy,

Please, oh please, let Neva sleep more during the night. She was an amazing sleeper...even requiring me to set an alarm so I could wake her up to feed her as a newborn. But now, as of a few weeks ago, she has decided that 3:00am is playtime. And will play, play, play for an hour...or two...or three.

She still wakes up happy as a clam. But, this Mom? This Mom cannot function on 3 hours of sleep.

Thanking you in advance for a wonderful night of sleep,
Sarah

My job

I don't often dislike my job.

But today? Today is one of those days that I do. It makes me question mankind and wonder how one person could possibly hurt another person.

How can a mother/father hurt their child?

How can a daycare provider hurt a child that a parent is trusting to watch over and take care of their child, while they are unable to?

How can a husband or wife hurt their spouse?

I just don't get it. I'm glad I don't get it. But it breaks my heart into one million tiny little pieces for those who do get it. And who are living with it everyday.