I have realized over the past 7 months, but this week especially, that I long to be a stay at home Mom.
Our first few weeks were extremely difficult and I didn't love my maternity leave for this reason. However, I am convinced that this is because we had such a hard time with breastfeeding in the beginning. It was hard, I was exhausted, she cried a lot, I cried a lot, I curled my toes EVERY time she wanted to eat. Dont' get me wrong, I enjoyed my time bonding with Neva...but it was hard. Probably the hardest 6 weeks of my life.
But now? Now I want to be able to stay at home and spend my days with her. I got to take yesterday off, due to our daycare provider being on vacation, but it just made me want to spend my days with her even more. I never knew how much I would want to be a stay at home Mom. It's hard work, it's a thankless job, but it's also the BEST job in the whole world.
It makes it easier that she nurses in about 10 minutes, she laughs ALL the time, she's rolling, she's pushing off things, she's doing something new and something more amazing every time I turn around. And her smile? Her hugs? Her big sloppy kisses? These are the best moments of my day....and I want more of them!
Our first few weeks were extremely difficult and I didn't love my maternity leave for this reason. However, I am convinced that this is because we had such a hard time with breastfeeding in the beginning. It was hard, I was exhausted, she cried a lot, I cried a lot, I curled my toes EVERY time she wanted to eat. Dont' get me wrong, I enjoyed my time bonding with Neva...but it was hard. Probably the hardest 6 weeks of my life.
But now? Now I want to be able to stay at home and spend my days with her. I got to take yesterday off, due to our daycare provider being on vacation, but it just made me want to spend my days with her even more. I never knew how much I would want to be a stay at home Mom. It's hard work, it's a thankless job, but it's also the BEST job in the whole world.
It makes it easier that she nurses in about 10 minutes, she laughs ALL the time, she's rolling, she's pushing off things, she's doing something new and something more amazing every time I turn around. And her smile? Her hugs? Her big sloppy kisses? These are the best moments of my day....and I want more of them!
I took Friday off to hang out with Sol. It was, hands down, one of our best days ever. The idea of going back to work on Monday makes my heart ache.
ReplyDeleteAll of that being said to just let you know that I get it- and I'm so sorry you have to go back instead of staying home with your wee one. It stinks.
Also? I'm so glad you had such a lovely time with your Neva. That love business is good, good stuff....
xoxo,
Courtney
Hey Sarah, I just want you to know that I don't think there's anything disempowering about being a stay at home mom. And I wonder what you mean by "thank-less", because if you mean taken for granted, I truly don't think that Eric would ever take you for granted and that rewards come from making choices and creating the life you want -- so it would be full of fulfillment if it were what you wanted to be doing! Hard work, and some of the most important work!!
ReplyDeleteLove you! I can't wait to spend some time with Neva this summer.